What should I do if my partner invalidates my experience?
Can you recommend specific techniques for overcoming being flooded during the day from thoughts or situations that reminds me of my husband’s behavior?
Watch Listen Read The specific technique when you’re flooded, I would let me offer a couple more here. I might take a breather and do a mindfulness meditation, I can listen to a guided meditation, you might go visit tarabrach.com where she has many mindfulness meditations guided meditations. When you’re flooded, you might do a […]
How can I reclaim special memories without thinking about my husband’s betrayals?
Watch Listen Read Since my partners formal disclosure, I now know that there was literally no time period or place that was safe from his addiction. He acted out with sex workers during or near major milestones, including when we traveled abroad for our wedding, took our child back on a trip to meet her […]
How can I get rid of my ongoing cycle of feeling numb and crazy?
Watch Listen Read I felt the walking dead some days, and then a total emotional mess on other days, how do I stop feeling numb? I would encourage journaling and giving a voice to the numb. And if you’re feeling crazy, that means your mind is racing, which means that you want to do some […]
My partner and I have separated, how can move past this pain and still hold my relationships?
Watch Listen Read When do I get to be supported? And when will he acknowledge my betrayal trauma? If you’re going to work on your relationship that will be essential. Now, again, that’s if we’re going to be working on the relationship he will need to do that. I would suggest an eye detect that […]
How do you move forward when your spouse is deep in shame and lacks empathy and remorse?
Watch Listen Read If you’re, if they’re in shame and lack empathy your question of moving forward is first of all, it’s going to be focusing on your healing because if you want him to, or your spouse to hold that pain, they might not be ready. They’ve got to do their work so they […]
Is my imagined memory about how my husband behaved while acting out an okay topic to write on?
Watch Listen Read The memory that is most intrusive for me is imagined one, how my husband might’ve looked or behaved while acting out. Since I obviously don’t have firsthand knowledge of what happened. Is this an okay topic to write on? Also, how is this similar or different from prolonged exposure therapy things? The […]
How do I move past lies, deceit and omissions?
Watch Listen Read In thinking about some of the unwanted thoughts I want and need to move past, I’m having a difficult time as I’ve asked my husband questions about these numerous times, and I know he’s lied about them. How do I move past lies, deceit and omissions? If he’s lied about them, that’s […]
Do you have any advice or suggestions on how I can find a balance of my extremes?
Watch Listen Read As I sat down to think about how I tend to cope, I realized I seem to be a person of extremes. I go from someone who is shutting down, zooming out, drained of energy, killing time on pointless activities, and then switch flips that no longer work and then go into […]
How do I talk to my kids?
Watch Listen Read That’s a very important question. This is a question, especially for parents of younger kids, but I guess in general, for all kids, I have three young boys, nine, seven, and three, and I think it will be important for my husband and I to address some of his struggles with our […]