What if I already wrote an impact letter and don’t want to go back and reread my husband’s restitution letter?
Watch Listen Read I freaking did an impact letter, I don’t want to go back and reread my husband’s restitution letter. I want to say to you, listen to yourself. If you don’t want to go back and reread your husband’s restitution letter, don’t. No one is saying you have to. If you don’t want […]
Watch Listen Read I think I feel more humiliated than I am shame that I’m feeling shame from my husband’s actions. And I think it’s important to distinguish the difference of humiliation versus shame. Humiliation is a different emotion you feel like outrage, like I don’t deserve this. I don’t deserve this. Where shame you […]
“Hi, I’m Alisha and I tell the important stories.”
One of the things that has helped me through the hardest times is figuring out a point to my life, a purpose, a driving theme that isn’t connected to my roles, or job, or financial status. I used to call myself a teacher, but then I wasn’t. I am a writer, but that’s just what I do for work. I ask myself, “what is the thing that gives me life that isn’t related to money or media or my relationship status?”
Sometimes you just need someone to tell you it is going to be okay. We can tell ourselves that we are enough and that it is okay to feel what we are feeling. We can tell ourselves that “it is what it is.” But sometimes it is hard to believe ourselves.
We have been promoting our class “Emotional Wabi Sabi” with Life Coach Stace Christianson this week. Many of you may be wondering what Wabi Sabi is. Wabi Sabi is a Japanese aesthetic in art that focuses on highlighting the imperfections, the irregularities, the rough patches. They believe that the imperfections are what make something beautiful.
It isn’t surprising that one of the most consistent self-care techniques for women navigating trauma is to use self affirmations. The toll of emotional and/or physical abuse from someone in a position of trust is devastating. The subconscious mind begins to believe the negative words it hears every day. In order to change the negative thought patterns and heal from the constant triggers, you have to reprogram your brain.
When you have been through trauma, social unrest and social energy can deeply affect you. You have probably become hypersensitive to cues and moods. If you spend too much time online or watching the news, you can get pulled into a deep sadness. It is very easy to give in to desperation and fear. It’s like how a small baby or the family pet always knows when something is wrong and then acts out to express the inexpressible. You are not crazy. You are not a mess. You are responding to your environment. The way to change things, to get some relief, is to change the environment.