Carlie’s Betrayal Trauma Story

Carlie always believed one should leave their spouse after infidelity – until she found out about her own husband’s affair and pornography addiction.

Her husband, Ryan, was exposed to porn from a young age, and his use continued in secret throughout the beginning of his marriage to Carlie. Even after Carlie found out, Ryan would still hide any occasional slip-ups from her, for fear of hurting her more. But these omissions turned into even bigger lies, and eventually led to his affair.

In the days that followed, Carlie experienced an emotional roller coaster – and Ryan hit rock bottom.

“I didn’t want to believe it.”
“I just kept throwing up.”
“My body’s not desirable, I had two children.”
“He’s sick of me.”
“I was going crazy.”
“I tried to put on a happy face.”
“I was scared of my emotions.”
“I was ashamed.”
“I shut everyone out.”
“If I was just honest from the beginning…”

Listen to Carlie and Ryan’s story:

Few experiences create as much hurt and pain as infidelity. Betrayal through infidelity can create such intense emotions and chaos that the trauma may remain for months or years later, and certain events can trigger old memories.

Learning how to move forward after betrayal is difficult to do alone, so Carlie and Ryan pursued a more specialized therapy approach. Carlie worked to heal the effects of Betrayal Trauma and PTSD (our studies have shown that 70% of people who have been betrayed were actually showing PTSD symptoms), and found support in talking to other women who had been through similar situations. Ryan dug deep to find the root source of his addictions, be more honest about his emotions, and learn better communication strategies.

Instead of returning to the way things used to be, Carlie and Ryan actually found themselves in a much better place – not only were they beginning to let go of all of the external pressures and comparisons that once clouded their marriage, but they were also connecting with each other on a deeper emotional level than ever before.


Bloom Guided offers a safe space for you to connect with other women, approach your trauma, and begin healing. While betrayal can affect everyone differently, having a supportive and empathetic network can be incredibly empowering. You deserve a stacked toolbox. Schedule a free consultation call today and take the next step forward in your healing journey.

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