You Are Enough

Hi. I just wanted to tell you that you are enough.

For some reason, we have a hard time believing that. I just want to tell you that you are. Right here, right now, you are enough. Even if you feel like a complete mess.

The epic journey of life seems to really be about learning to trust and love yourself. But that seems so hard. Here are some things you can do to start building your relationship with yourself.

Build a relationship of trust with yourself by really taking care of yourself–call it self care, self soothing, “me time,” whatever. When you tenderly take care of yourself, you are creating evidence that you will be there for you when things get hard. Most of us are used to taking care of others, and some of us want nothing more than for someone to finally take care of us. And the wonder of it all is that you don’t have to wait for someone else. You can provide yourself the relief and care that you so desperately need.

Practice self-awareness. Awareness is being so attuned to yourself that you know what your needs are and what emotions you are feeling. You know when you need to drink some water. You know when you need some extra sleep. You know when you need to put on the girl power playlist and run for your life on the treadmill. It takes practice and checking in with yourself. Find a way to bring yourself awareness: writing, talking to a trusted friend, meditation, monitoring media consumption–what kind of music are you being drawn to? Notice your social patterns, are you wanting be alone all the time? Are you not wanting to be alone all the time?

Self-talk: change your script. Be kind and compassionate to yourself. Think of a small child who is lost in a department store. How would you speak to this child? Now think about your best friend, heart broken and exhausted. How would you speak to her? Now think about how you speak to yourself. Changing the script in your head takes constant practice, but it can completely change your life.

Find allies to help you along the way. This will involve being brave and putting yourself out there until you find your people. We all fear rejection. Trauma lies to us and tells us that we don’t deserve love and acceptance. We may sometimes look for love and acceptance in the wrong places and bring more toxic people and behaviors into our lives. Finding the right people takes time. When we get rejected, we can practice all the things previously discussed and find strength to find our tribe. When you do find them, practice healthy boundaries so it doesn’t become co-dependant and toxic.

All this creates a trusting and nourishing relationship with yourself. You can start to believe me when I tell you that YOU ARE ENOUGH. When you have that, you project positive energy that attracts the right people, the right resources, and the strength to hold on until you find what you need. And maybe all you need is to find yourself.


Join Bloom for Women

For women seeking healing from betrayal trauma.

Join Bloom for Partners

For men seeking help for unwanted sexual behaviors.